Day 186: Re-Entry

March 31, 2011

Boy woke up at 2:42 but went back to sleep, then again at 5. No hope of going back down then so we were quite tired this morning. Also a bit lonely. Family withdrawal was rough. Also seeing Fraser for a few short hours last night and minutes this morning. I also miss my Boulder neighbours: going next door to Cindy's to catch up on the trip and what's going on in the gardens, popping over to Margaret's and having a beer with her as her four kids and Jacob played together or having Kelly invite us over for some tea and talking. I miss that feel of community so much and coming back here makes me miss them all more than I have since our arrival. Odd not to have friends calling and wanting to get together.

There are some things I missed though, like sharp knives, deciding on my food choices, my husband, fresh cracked pepper, cutting boards. Not to say anything against my family, but after doing more cooking, I'm used to the things I use regularly. 

Things I don't like: feeling new in a place still, cleaning my house (although Fraser did pick up and vacuum which was wonderful), always being in charge of what to make for dinner, suburbia, no siblings for company.

Finally got out of the house this pm when the sun was shining (something that apparently hasn't happened around here in the past three weeks - almost). Went to the grocery store, ran into one of our babysitters. Then went out to look at the beautiful flowers. Everything is blooming here! It smells wonderful, not only like flowers, but also like... something from my childhood: humid air being warmed by the spring sun, the plants coming back to life from the wet earth, the musky smell of boxwoods that will always remind me of visiting Oregon as a child. The smell of having the windows open for the first time, clearing out the dusty smells of winter with air that smells of clean laundry. That is lovely.

  Went to the park, saw a bald eagle and ran into our other babysitter and all Karen's kids who said hi. Running into two people I "know" made me feel better. I feel that maybe I'm not totally new here after all. And my friend Brandin did send me an email just the other day asking when I was coming back. I guess it feels worse when thinking about Boulder but on its own, it's not so bad.