Jacob has been sleeping so well here that his naps are now later in the afternoon. I like this in general but when we're trying to do longer day trips, it breaks up the day in an odd way. Especially if a place doesn't open until 10am. This morning we got ambitious and dropped off my car at the mechanic to have it checked out a bit more then headed to another pumpkin patch. Lee Farms. This place appealed to me because they advertised fresh cider and donuts. I love a good cider mill type donut. I miss the cider mills of Michigan.
Then a pony ride. Jacob asked to go. He had to be on the brown one. Once he got on, he wasn't too sure, though and quickly asked to get off. Funny.
We had a great time. Jacob was exhausted when we got home. I can't believe we fit all that in before naptime!
After nap, Mimi and Pop took him out for a bike ride and to the park. I told them I might join them later and I might not. One thing I'm learning: after almost two years of almost exclusive time with Jacob, letting go of him being with me is challenging. I don't think I need to be with him all the time. I don't think he won't be perfectly happy when he's away from me. I enjoy time alone. I know he enjoys time away from me. And still, he's with me 95% of the time. Being without him feels strange. I think the longest I've ever been away from him at one time is maybe 5 or 6 hours. After being away from him for about three hours, I start to think about him more. I ask myself how he's doing,what he's doing, if he's needing me at all. It's just strange being without him. That's all there is to it. Not a common occurrence. But it's so great. It's great for me that I can have time alone, and it's so great that he can have other relationships and know that he's fine without me. I wish it were easier to find opportunities to leave him with others. I'll have to look into it. Of course, if it's this hard to do it with my in-laws, it'll be harder to do it with strangers. We'll see how it goes.
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